Rats

Dear Medical School Classmates,
I am compelled to share a headmaster story.  I've been doing this job for 35 years and have had one unique-thing-after-another occur during my tenure.  There are indeed new things under the sun!

When I was headmaster of the Chesapeake Academy in the tidewater of Virginia, I hired a crackerjack kindergarten teacher. Like most teachers of that ilk, she labeled everything in the classroom in  block letters on construction paper:  "CHAIR" or "DESK" or "DOOR" or whatever.  Her only quirk was that she had two enormous white rats as classroom pets.  One was named Rastus; the other was Medusa.  Their cages were labeled "RAT".

I was not in favor of rats in the classroom.  I routinely encouraged her to get some guppies or a hamster.  Nothing worked.  I found it difficult to explain during admission tours, but since she was such a good teacher, I did my best to support her.

One day Rastus went the way of all flesh.  A child was sent to my office to ask where they could have the funeral.  That put me over the top!  I stormed over to the Kindergarten and in no uncertain terms let her know that we would NOT perform any last rites for a rat.  They could bury the rodent behind the building if they wished, but there was to be no "service". 

Beth Clark, the teacher, handled it beautifully.  She taught a wonderful lesson on living and dying, of returning to the earth, and how Rastus would help other things live.  I observed this homily as we gathered in a circle around the hole with the stiffened rat therein.  When it was time to cover the body with dirt, little Ben Smithers cried out, "But Miss Clark!  Aren't we supposed to pray at a funeral?"

I glared at Miss Clark.  I knew something like this would happen.  But in her competent way she replied, "Ben, if you wish to pray, you may."  Little Ben then caused all of his circled classmates to fold their hands, bow their heads, and then led them in the following prayer:

"God is great, God is good.  Let us thank him for our food."


yours,
Henry